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The 24 hour turnaround - Sing With Me If It's Just For Today...
If I should fall behind, Guyster, wait for me.
guysterrules
guysterrules
The 24 hour turnaround
My inclination during a job interview is to find a word, the more obscure the better, and cleverly weave it into every sentence that spills from my mouth. It doesn't matter how inappropriate its usage might be. No. The key is to repeat it over and over again until the interviewer suggests that I leave.



My last formal job interview for a position I really, really wanted - a glass of ice cold Diet Coke in the middle of the desert kind of want - was for a director's position overseeing alternative programming for UPN. The interview happened well over two years ago yet its memory is so vivid, I can recall it at a moment's notice should I need some last minute shame.

I'd like to think it was the forty-five minute wait in a lobby better suited for a sensory deprivation tank than a waiting lounge. When Sascia (pronounced Sah-see-ah) finally came to usher me into Danielle Green's office, I was struck first by this woman ten years my junior in blonde dreadlocks. The hair choice would be jarring enough on a young, style-enslaved Jewish girl but on a thirty three year old executive, it was just plain disturbing. I recovered long enough to notice myself standing in a fifties-styled soda fountain complete with patent leather bar stools at the counter and a jukebox. I suppose a poodle skirt and dreadlocks just didn't mix for Danielle because she was dressed head to toe in camoflage. Sometimes the id can be a real devil.

We saddled atop two of the stools and mine swiveled. In fact I couldn't stop swiveling and it took every ounce of self-containment not to go all the way around.

"So how much do you know about the job?" she asked as she was scrawling her stylus against her palm pilot.

"I know UPN wants to become competitive in the reality environment," and there it was. My word of the day. Environment. She would be hearing it again.

"Yes we do and I am quite proud of what I've put together so far," she said with earnestness usually only found on the good ship Lollipop.

The only thing Danielle accomplished during her time at UPN was developing Chains Of Love, an abomination to the good name of reality television.

"The current market environment allows for an endless range of programming that would lend itself to the reality environment," there was no turning back for me now. I was sweating, I was in a soda joint and apparently the only word I knew was environment.

"The position calls for a strong feel for alternative approaches," she began.

"I love alternative," I interrupted because what better way to express how edgy I could be than to repeat the word "alternative"? I felt as stupid as if I had just run into Trent Reznor and said, "Boy, Mr. Nails, I really like your alternative music!"

I looked at her during a half-swivel and saw she was starting to sulk. I decided to add, "I've spent a lot of time in the alternative environment."

She looked at her watch, I put my foot on the floor to stop a swivel and the meeting was over. I sped home and wrote her a two page emailed apology. I never heard from Danielle again.

I just got back to LA from my DC interviews this morning. I am tired and have an early flight tomorrow for Montreal. I'm going to bed and crawling under the covers. I'll write about the DC experience when I return on Sunday.
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Comments
ruralrob From: ruralrob Date: July 16th, 2003 02:32 am (UTC) (Link)
Intersting.

And about something completely different, here's one reason why you need to think carefully before changing your name (unless you want a bank named afetr you. . .)

creamycambot From: creamycambot Date: July 18th, 2003 08:59 am (UTC) (Link)
GSN’s s Shift: Fun and Games of All Kinds
With 4 lighting-fast comedians and 3 Game Show Net hosts playing a special version of “National Lampoon’s Funny
Money” during the net’s TCA party, details of GSN’s new programming plan almost went unnoticed by critics, who were
busy laughing or chatting with Heidi Fleiss or Walter “Mr Chekov” Koenig. While it isn’t planning drastic changes, beginning
in June ’04 the net will depart from its games-only programming and give viewers 1 game-related doc/month. As a
warm-up, GSN will run a doc on video games later this year to coincide with the launch of its video game block and 2
docs in Q1 next year. If history is an indication, all will be well. The net’s only doc (Sun, Mar 16, 8pm), about the “Press
Your Luck” scandal of the ’80s, delivered GSN's highest numbers in its 9-yr existence, posting an avg 1.5 HH rating,
peaking to 1.8 at the beginning of the 2nd hour. Actually, the docs are part of pres Rich Cronin’s plan to position GSN as
“the leader in games on television, and that means game shows and more.” Earlier this year, the net debuted its first
reality show, “Chuck Woolery’s Naturally Stoned,” which premiered to a 0.7, the net’s 2nd-best series debut. In the fall the
net will present a series of shows ranging from 3-21 mins called “Games Across America,” that will be “like mini documentaries”
looking at games and contests ranging from tales about lotteries and casinos to hot-dog-eating. “We’re thrilled to
get into other game-related genres and get great ratings...and we got more press than ever.” Topics are not set for the
docs, he says, but “we think there are millions of stories related to games and winning. We’ll focus on the people. There
are a lot of interesting, obsessed human beings out there [competing],” adding that his 9-yr-old son just won the chocolate-
pudding-eating contest at school. “We’re brainstorming ideas and being pitched. We even have a feature film
director who wants to make a doc...we’re not looking for filler programming, we’re looking for signature programming that
will reinforce our position as the leading network for games.” What is phase 3 and when will we see it? Perhaps gamerelated
scripted series and game-related films, Cronin says. “When you’re in 70mln homes (it’s in 51mln and growing)
you can do that, and we want to always be experimenting, getting into all genres of game-related programming.”
backawayslowly From: backawayslowly Date: August 10th, 2003 12:08 pm (UTC) (Link)
*cringe*

Oh, man. I've SO been there.

*double cringe*
guysterrules From: guysterrules Date: August 10th, 2003 12:37 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh. You mean you've been in that environment?

You totally rock, dude, for going back and ready some of my stuff. Thanks!
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