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Smoking - Good or Bad? - Sing With Me If It's Just For Today... — LiveJournal
If I should fall behind, Guyster, wait for me.
Smoking - Good or Bad?
I have been smoking cigarettes for the last 368 days. Prior to that, my smoking resume begins at age 17 while a freshman at college and continued through 1987 when I became serious about bodybuilding. I was a hard-core non-smoker for many years until I picked it up again when I moved to NYC in 1993.

While in New York, I was surrounded by smokers. I could smoke in my office. I could smoke in my boss' office. I could smoke in the produce section of Food Emporium if I wanted to, for crying out loud. That was New York in 1993. It also was much more difficult to keep the work-out/diet regime going in that city. "Egg whites only, please." The greek diner waiters would always give me that head cock a dog gets when you say a familiar word. I learned how to say, "No yolk" in broken Greek. They would arrive on a plate swimming in grease.

When we moved back to LA, I contnued smoking out of depression and habit. Then I stopped. Then I started. Stopped again. Tail chasing at its best.

OK all you non-smokers out there, please stop waving your hand in front of your nose. This is just a discussion. I really, really like smoking cigarettes. I know this is lost on those who have never smoked and all I can say to you is "Lucky you!" If my way-back machine was working, I would never have started either.

I am at an impasse. I love smoking cigarettes but continuing the habit prevents me from going back to the gym. The two events are inextricably tied . My therapist (a smoker) suggests I go to back to the gym and smoking will naturally fall away from my life. Not a bad thought and worth a try.

To stop smoking also represents a personal triumph. For the last year, I have been aggressively unhealthy. Beyond smoking at a level of Fran Lebowitz, I have embraced a horrendous diet. I have lost 30 pounds going from a nicely husky 210 to a lanky 180. I don't want to be lanky. Lanky bad. But then I get tangled up into this emotional quicksand saying that I don't want to have a positive body image, I'm not interested in being attractive again, and I don't care about my health.

Finally, smoking is a habit. A determined little rabbit with sharp teeth that grabs your arm and won't let go. After kicking two major addictions, this has proven to be the most difficult. I have tried the patch, hypnosis and Zyban. Zyban is just a SSRi anti-depressant that has unwanted psychological effects so no Zyban. The patch has its own personal drawbacks. Hypnosis has worked in the past and it will probably be the road I take.

Anybody else have any other suggestions? I'm all smokey ears.

Current Mood: smokey
Current Music: Smoke Gets In Your Eyes - Bryan Ferry

7 comments or Leave a comment
From: inkprincess Date: January 24th, 2003 01:01 pm (UTC) (Link)
i say, when you're really ready to quit, you will with no problem. i'm an ex-smoker. quit april 11, 2000. :) smoked for about 7 years. tried many times to quit, and it didn't work out, and one time, it stuck. just like that. always cold turkey. don't get me wrong, i would love to start again, LOL. just don't have $$ for it.

if you don't feel ready to stop, don't force it. you'll surely lose that way.
guysterrules From: guysterrules Date: January 24th, 2003 02:05 pm (UTC) (Link)
Kris, did Megan have anything with you quitting? That would be a powerful motivation although one unavailable to me : )

Man! Cold turkey and a self-piercer. You have nerves of steel, baby!

I think you're right. I think I am close to that point.
From: inkprincess Date: January 24th, 2003 02:13 pm (UTC) (Link)
nope, she had nothing to do with it. i actually quit for Chris. and to save $$.

there are times when i would love to have just 1 more smoke. LOL.
explosivo From: explosivo Date: January 24th, 2003 02:13 pm (UTC) (Link)
personally, i say... quit for a day. say you'll smoke tomorrow. when you wake up tomorrow, make the same decision. don't quit for a lifetime. quit for a day. hey, i'm about 2 weeks shy of quitting drugs/alcohol for a day... for 19 years!!!!!
guysterrules From: guysterrules Date: January 24th, 2003 02:27 pm (UTC) (Link)
I know you're right. Quitting forever is daunting. Quitting for one day is reasonable. I can do that. I can. I will.
lapalomita From: lapalomita Date: January 24th, 2003 04:48 pm (UTC) (Link)
I've never been a smoker, so I can offer no sage advice on quitting the sticks of death (as I unaffectionately call them). My mom was a smoker for about 10 years & just quit cold turkey one day. Now the smell of smoke disgusts her.

I am trying to get Iggy to quit smoking & I think he just might. Not b/c of anything I've said, but b/c one of his uncles in Israel is dying of lung cancer. He called me from their home today & was really taken aback to see someone suffer so much, not to mention seeing how much his family is suffering right now. An LJ friend of mine just found out her mother has lung cancer & her mother quit smoking 28 years ago. Apparently, the damage she'd done to her lungs during her 10 years of smoking was irreversible. You are literally mutating your cells when you smoke. Isn't that awful?

I guess the best advice, coming from a non-smoker's point of view, is to not quit only for yourself. Don't quit only b/c it makes your clothes smell or your teeth yellow. Quit b/c many people out there adore you & would be lost if you left them. B/c seeing you deteriorate before their eyes would crush them. Don't put your loved ones through this. Quit for them. You can do it sweetie!
guysterrules From: guysterrules Date: January 24th, 2003 04:51 pm (UTC) (Link)
Ooo. Ouch. Sore spots being hit. But I know you're right. Left brain knows. Right brain is coming to terms with it. Some day soon the two shall meet.
7 comments or Leave a comment